Loading Up At Sports Authority
I am not a jock. I never was a jock. Though Iâ€™m 6â€™1â€ and in reasonable shape now, throughout my childhood I was undersized (I grew late), which, when combined with physically slow and a bit uncoordinated, makes me very well suited for, well, being a computer geek, not an athlete.
But my two oldest children are now 6 and 4.5, and Iâ€™m starting to hear rumblings from other parents about little league, coaching, etc. Moreover, I fear that if I leave their athletic training solely to my wife, it will be nothing but ballet and gymnastics â€“ fine for Katie, but for Danny, wellâ€¦
Anyways, my kids have been watching a bit of the Cardinals fine season with me this year, so last week I broke out the whiffle ball and bat for my future shortstops. Following on that great success (not a single injury!), we went to Sports Authority today for a buying binge. Weâ€™ll practice on the warm days this fall, and theyâ€™ll storm the T-Ball league next spring â€“ yeah! (and the German skinflint side of me was thinking that late September would be a great time to pick up baseball equipment on closeout)
At first I felt a bit sheepish when I told the sales woman at the cash register that I needed help figuring out which baseball equipment to get for my kids â€“ did I miss that day at Fatherhood training school? My manhood was further jeopardized when they summoned from another department an athletic looking woman who could probably beat me at not only baseball, but pretty much any Olympic sport, all the way down to curling. But she knew her stuff, and promptly picked out the right size gloves and bats for my kids, and filled me in on the local little-league scene. Finally, I had her size me up for a glove for myself. The last glove I had was a gift from my dad at around age 10, and hasnâ€™t fit me since about age 13. Now, though, I have a proper glove â€“ but I need to make sure I scuff it up before I show up for any other dads-type little league event â€“ you canâ€™t show up with a shiny new glove thatâ€™s never been used.
Baseball Spree at Sports Authority: $197*
Two Hours Later, Your Daughter Says Baseball Is â€œBoringâ€: Priceless
OK, while she did say that, it was after our first baseball practice of the day ended in an 0 for 9 slump by my daughter. A bit later, both kids wanted to play again, and this time, they got better pitching by Dad. Where did she swing last time â€“ ok if I can just pitch it to exactly that pointâ€¦ Still, it was a lot of fun, and I had to turn down my sonâ€™s request for a 4th baseball session late in the day.
As bad as I was/am at baseball, two of my uncles played minor league ball back in their time. Maybe the baseball talent skipped a generation sideways and down, and my kids will surpass their dad at this one. In the meantime, at least my kids will appreciate the Cardinals games a bit moreâ€¦
* 2 bats, 3 gloves, 3 balls, a batting tee, and glove â€˜moisturizerâ€™ â€“ yeah, like Iâ€™m really gonna follow through and use that regularly, plus a Nerf football and a Scooby Doo basketball. And no, the baseball stuff wasnâ€™t on closeout â€“ donâ€™t they know baseball season is over in 3 weeks? Ahh wellâ€¦
Best Sports Writing I Saw This Week
â€œIf you believe what the White Sox manager told Copley News Service columnist Mike Nadel the other day, he might just up and retire if the Sox win the World Series this year. The way things are going for the South Siders, the qualifier seems a tad out there. Itâ€™s like starting a sentence, â€œIf Paris Hilton becomes a nunâ€¦â€â€
(Rick Morrissey via The Sports Economist)